Words, how powerful they are. As an educator by heart (and degree lol) I studied the foundation of language. When it starts to form, how to teach it and how important words are to learning any subject. As a parent I’ve learned how important words are to children in a whole new way. Words are how we can either build up or tear down our children. Words are how we can show our tiny humans encouragement about how wonderful they are or hinder it. So, how can we use our words for all the good they have to offer you ask… affirmations.
Affirmations | using them as a parent
Our children hang on our every word and long for our approval.
When my son is playing I often times catch him doing something and then turning to look at my husband or I. He wants to know we see him, that we are proud or approve. Using words with our children seems so simple but it’s easy to get caught up, isn’t it? I know, I know kids are hard work, they are difficult and some days it takes all we have to have nice words at all to say. Am I right? All of that can cause us to be repetitive or on auto pilot with our words and responses to our children.
These are affirmations but it’s easy to get stuck saying blanket statements.
When I talk to my toddler I try to speak to him like I do everyone. Even though he’s only 21 months old he is like a sponge. Did you know that in a growth spurt between 16-23 months a child can learn up to 2 NEW WORDS A DAY??!! That’s crazy! I want to make sure that I am using all the words I can with him. Make it a point to use different words, describing words and words that are tailored to your child. Then, encourage your child with all those wonderful words.
Let’s say your child just built a tower out of blocks. You could say, “Good job Honey,” which there is nothing wrong with. But what if you said “Wow, I bet you tried hard to build that!” ?
Variety is the spice of life
Using descriptive language is a great way to up your affirmation game. Here are a few of my favorite affirmations to use with my kids.
Keep trying, you got this.
My son is very strong willed so this is one that I use on a daily basis. I am acknowledging his determination and telling him he’s doing well. I could say good job and that would be good, but by using this statement I am speaking directly to what he is doing and also using words like trying. Children tend learn verbs first so using them in your affirmations is important.
This is huge in my house. I am a manner stickler. I want to raise my children to be polite (which I assume you do as well). So how do we do that? Be examples. If I we want our children to be polite and use words like please and thank you, then we need to use them. Thank you is a HUGE affirmation. You are acknowledging whatever it is your child has done and praising them.
I try to use thank you with my sons whenever I can. I want them to know they are appreciated and that their actions are important. Even something as small as offering me a bite of his dinner (that I don’t necessarily want) is cause for a thank you. I want him to know that his action to share is appreciated.
You are so important
Sometimes affirmations are conversation starters. When you are cuddling or playing on the floor with your babies make it a point to voice all those feelings you have. When you look at your baby and think “you’re so wonderful,” or “You are the most important thing in my life,” tell them! Those mom and dad moments where you feel all the feels about how fast time is going those are great moments to express how important they are.
It takes two seconds to say. They may not understand or even look at you when you say it haha but they heard it. That phrase, those words they becomes part of what they think of themselves.
Being intentional with our children
Just like anything other goal you have, you have to start with being intentional. Start by listening to how you speak to your children on a regular basis.
What if we used our words to be intentional and specific about our children and their actions? Not only would we be building our children’s confidence, showing them their worth, building their vocabulary but we would be using our words to give our children that inner voice they will hear for the rest of their lives.
I would love to hear some of your favorite affirmations that you use with your tiny humans, let me know below!
Want to read more of the affirmations that I use?
Click below to get a free download of 50 intentional affirmations to use when parenting your tiny human.
Should You Hire a Birth Photographer?
Are you pregnant and wondering if you should hire a birth photographer? Then you are in the right spot. I was in your shoes just about a year and a half ago. About 8 months pregnant, exhausted and trying to sort out the wants from the needs and on a budget to boot!
When you are pregnant there are so many things that people try to force on you. They tell you all these things that you NEED to have! Your mom, mother-in-law, commercials, social media, Megan down the street… EVERYONE! Everyone has an opinion on what you should do.
With Birth Photography being a ‘newer,’ thing I’m sure you have questioned:
- Is something you need?
- Is it worth the expense?
- Will it be weird?
- Will you even look at those pictures down the road?
- Is it something you and your partner even want or is it just on trend?
I wanna answer some of these questions and tell you a little about our experience and hopefully by the end of this post you can decided, Should You Hire a Birth Photographer?
Is birth photography something you need?
This is the question I am sure you are hung up on. Is this a want or a need?
That is a tough question, obviously you do not need to have a photographer there to have a baby.
BUT if you want amazing photos of your bundle of joy then you could justify that having a professional photographer there is way better than phone pictures taken by the nurse.
Is it worth the expense?
Look, I know money can be tight but if you decide you want pictures of this day you will pay the money. Birth photographers (from my experience) love what they do! They want to be there with families during their most precious moments. Lots of them offer payment plans and their prices vary. So, finding one in your price range should be doable.
Keep in mind though it is an investment, what they do they are very good at. They are on call 24/7 for their clients so you are paying for them to be there day or night to take those photos and be a huge part of your life no matter what is going on in theirs.
Will it be weird?
My answer is no, for a few reasons.
- If you find a photographer you like you will enjoy having them there. It shouldn’t feel weird.
I suggest looking around and really finding a photographer you jive with. They are going to be there for an intimate moment and if you are going to invest make sure you are comfortable with your photographer just as much as their photography style.
- You are so focused on meeting your baby that you are not really aware of the people in the room.
This goes for all the nurses, the doctor, everyone! If this is your first pregnancy just know, nothing else will matter to you but getting your baby into the world safely. Any embarrassment, shyness it all disappears I promise.
- You do not have to have any angles you don’t want!.
So you only want pictures taken from above, you can have that. Don’t want anyone in the action zone, you don’t have to. These are your photographs. Any good photographer will ask you what you want and what you are comfortable with.
Basically, it is TOTALLY worth it…
Yes, in my opinion it is worth every penny!
There are so many wonderful photographers out there for every personality, birth plan and momma.
We used Stacey from Cincy Birth Photography. If you are in the Cincinnati area she’s your girl!!
She is also a doula which is a popular combo in the birthing community. These photographers not only capture your moments on camera but some of them are trained to help you through labor. How cool is that?!
We loved having Stacey in both roles. Not only did we have someone capturing the whole event on camera but I also had someone there advocating for me. She was there to help me through labor, be my voice, reassure my husband through the process and take amazing photos!
We absolutely love having photos like this to cherish forever.
You also have someone else in the room who will remember little details.
When Stacey posted our sneak peak on Facebook she posted the sweetest caption of something that was said between Alex and I. I honestly do not remember this whole conversation.. I was a little busy. But these are the words that went with this photo:
What these amazing people capture is SO MUCH MORE than pictures! This quote is now part of this photograph. A small moment we may have forgot had Stacey had not been there with us. Having her there was everything for this day, the time before baby and after.
Is it something my partner and I want or is it just on trend?
It is a newer thing but it is one I am glad I am on board with. This is the question you now have to answer:
Do you want once in a life time photos of your baby’s birth?
I do not for one second regret the money we spent to have these photos. I would not have these precious moments on film if not for Stacey! For that we are forever grateful.
If you used a birth photographer, how was your experience? Are you glad that you chose to have someone capture your baby’s birth? Let me know if the comments!
So you just told everyone that you are pregnant or maybe you are coming up on your 20 week anatomy scan. I can almost guarantee you’ve heard the phrase, ” Congratulations! What are you having?” Am I right?
When I first got pregnant we had struggled so long to get pregnant that I decided I didn’t care what the sex was and we opted to wait to find out the gender. I know, I know you think I am crazy but hear me out. There are so many wonderful reasons to wait to find out the gender of the baby until the moment they are born. So here they are.
12 Reasons to NOT Find Out the Gender of Your Baby
Reason #1 No Expectations
There are so many expectations for new parents. Maybe everyone in your family has felt a certain way during their pregnancy or everyone just ‘knows,’ you’re going to have a girl first. Taking the gender of the baby off the table until the day of can be a bit freeing.
There is no expectations for what the baby will be. But more importantly it takes any expectations off of your unborn child (at least of a little while). You can hold off the ‘Johnny is going to be the best quarterback on the team,’ or ‘If it’s a girl you’re going to name her after aunt Bertha, right?’. These comments can be so overwhelming as a new parent.
Reason #2 You Get to Pick Two Names
If you don’t already have names picked out, waiting to find out what you’re having gives you the opportunity to pick a boy and a girl name that you love.
When my husband and I decided to wait on finding out the gender I was excited that we got to sit down and really spend time thinking of a name we wanted for both sexes. It made the the experience sweeter. Dreaming up names for a girl or a boy not knowing which name you will use until the day of.
Reason #3 It Drives People Crazy
Okay, this one of my favorites, it drives people crazy that they can’t know the gender! I know it’s bad but come on! Everyone has so many opinions and you get so much unwanted advice, it really is nice to have this one thing that no one can take from you.
I secretly loved when people asked with their preconceived notions and I could shut them down with “we’re not finding out.” I just enjoyed this one thing about MY pregnancy that no one could make a comment about.
Reason #4 The 20 Week Scan is So Much More Than Gender
So many moms, especially first time moms may not know this. If it wasn’t for my obsessive researching I may not have either. The scan where you normally find out the gender is actual to locate so many other things than sexual organs.
This scan also is for the doctor to make sure your baby has all the chambers of its heart, a kidney, a liver, to measure the spine, etc. SO MANY IMPORTANT THINGS! When you leave gender out of it, it’s amazing how excited you get over a kidney and knowing baby has all the right organs.
Reason #5 People Buy You More Gifts After Baby is Born
This one may seem selfish but I mean it in a sweet way. Since people couldn’t bombard you with gender specific gifts at your shower (at least for us) right after baby was born people went and bought more clothes and small items that were gender specific.
I was a nice little welcome for baby to have a few pieces of gender specific items without having only tutus and bow ties.
Reason #6 The Gift You Do Get at the Shower Are Necessary
To piggy back off reason 5, the gifts you do receive at your shower are useful and necessary. We actual had people approach us because they didn’t know what to buy because they didn’t know they gender… huh? As new parents you need so many things and when people are asked to buy stuff you need and not just the ‘cute,’ stuff you seem to get stuff that is necessary.
Reason #7 Gender Neutral Gear is Great for Baby 2
If you plan to have more than one child having baby gear that is gender neutral is awesome! At least for the first couple of months you have clothes that would work for a girl or a boy. For us that has been great. When our first outgrew things we would pack it up and save it. Of course you could do this knowing the gender as well but if you end up with the opposite gender the second time then you have clothes you won’t use.
Having gear that works for both genders has been amazing and saved us a ton of money!
Reason #8 There is No Chance the Scan Was Wrong
I think we all know someone who knows someone, who had a scan and the gender was WRONG! Can you imagine? You think you’re having _____ and it’s ______! By waiting to find out you don’t risk the scan being wrong because you find out in the moment. I know it doesn’t happen often but it gave me piece of mind knowing they would just tell me when baby was born.
Reason #9 In Labor Not Knowing the Gender is Great Motivation
When you’re in labor and pushing any motivation is welcomed. Not knowing what gender our baby was or what their name would be was AMAZING motivation for me to give it my all. I wanted to give ‘one more push,’ each time because I was so excited to find out what we were having.
Reason #10 It Helps You Stay On Budget
When you are buying things that you need and not things that are just cute you stay on budget. When I went out shopping for baby I knew what we needed for baby. Not that I didn’t buy some cute stuff but staying gender neutral kept my eye on the prize and on budget. I bought what I knew we needed to have and things that would last instead of buying something strictly because it was ‘so cute.’
Reason #11 It’s the Best Surprise
I know there are only two options but mama when you are pushing for hours or after you have major surgery and you find out what your little one is, and what their name is… It is the best surprise EVER. There is no party or gift like not knowing what your baby is one moment and knowing the next. There are few things left in life that we can be surprised by. This one is one I wish everyone could experience.
Reason #12 There is Nothing Else Like It
If none of the reasons above convinced you not to find out the gender, then listen to this one.
There is nothing else in the world like the doctor telling you “it’s a _____,” and not knowing beforehand.
There is absolutely nothing like looking at your partner and knowing which name you are going to use.
There is nothing like spending the hours after the birth talking about how you feel knowing it’s a girl or a boy. If you are looking for one of the rare beauties in life, this is one of them.
There is no right choice. this was ours and we loved every second and are so excited to do it again. If you chose or are choosing to not find out the gender I would love to hear you reasons in the comments.